Satire — The Investment Circus

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Here’s a hot tip to share with your friends: The Investment Circus is back in town, and everyone’s invited!

The newly-renovated circus has booked a lot of fresh faces and promises to combine daily entertainment with an exciting learning experience. Plenty of people have already taken stock. The initial ticket offering for the debut performance, an exclusive event held Thursday in a multi-ringed arena known as Wall Street, sold out fast. For everyone else, Friday was the first opportunity to get under the big tent.

Image source:

Image source:

What treats can you expect once you’re in? Prepare to be awed by high-flying trapeze artists, bulls, bears and other wild animals, and an entire troupe of clowns. The extravaganza also includes contortionists, daredevil high-wire walkers, and a dog and pony act. If you crave more thrills, the midway features a petting zoo, dart throwing contests, and a roller coaster ride. There will be plenty of sweet talk and flavored sugary drinks as well.

“Our goal is to give all Americans the chance to participate in the hustle and bustle,” says Tech Bubble, director of publicity. “We want to make sure no one misses this year’s Investment Circus.”

While times have been tough for many traveling shows, the Investment Circus has been doing quite well. Mr. Bubble declines to say just how much the circus earns, but he swears the proceeds go to a worthy cause. He urges everyone to pay the price of admission, which he believes is quite reasonable.

“Today’s circus is different from anything you’ve ever seen before,” says Mr. Bubble. “We’ll help you create memories you’ll never forget.”


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