Jack and The Fountain of Youth — Audio Installment 49

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JACK AND THE FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH
by HL Carpenter
ISBN: 978-0-9884095-1-4
Ebook ISBN: 978-0-9884095-0-7
Copyright (c) 2012 by Top Drawer Ink Corp.

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Continued from Audio Installment 48
(New here? Choose an installment or start at the beginning)

 

Jack and The Fountain of Youth — Audio Installment 49

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Read along with us!
Below is the text version of the audio.
(Show notes are beneath the text.)

The wetness had melded the leather boot laces into a tight slippery knot. Nessa tugged at the knot, worry making her fingers clumsy.

Tenspot hovered behind her. “I wish I had my pocketknife.”

When the knot loosened, Jack crabbed backward, pulling his foot free. The abandoned boot and sock stayed in place, plugging the opening like a cork in a bottle.

Nessa rocked onto her heels, shaking dirt from her hands. “Any pain?”

“No.” Jack leaned back on his elbows and flexed his ankle. “The bone is not broken.”

“Are you sure?” Tenspot asked. “I know how to set broken bones with a tree branch.”

“I’m glad we didn’t have to put that remedy to the test.” Nessa stood up. “Let me check for cuts.”

She rolled up the leg of Jack’s jeans, the dirt on her hands making dark outlines on the denim, like Indian paintings on a cave wall.

Tenspot crowded closer.

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SHOW NOTES

We’re new to the Audacity, the sound program we use for our audio recordings, and to sound effects in general. These are our thoughts on the current episode.

Recording. We recorded this segment in two takes, after three practice runs with the microphone off.

Technical. This week, we moved a bit closer to the microphone. We are using the AM radio effect in Audacity, which covers much of the “echo” effect from being a few inches away from the mic, but we think our voice sounds richer when closer to the mic.

Comments. We eased up a bit on the changes to Tenspot’s voice, and think he sounds less like a chipmunk. We’re still not consistent with the original recording of his voice, and that makes changing his voice a bit tricky because the changes don’t always sound the same.

Story changes. This week we made multiple changes to the written version.

Below is the original.

The wetness had melded the leather laces into a tight, slippery knot. Nessa tugged at it, worry making her fingers clumsy. Tenspot hovered behind her, muttering about wishing he’d remembered to bring his pocketknife.

When Nessa finally worked the knot loose, Jack crabbed backward, pulling his foot free. The abandoned boot and sock stayed in place, plugging the opening like a cork in a bottle. Nessa rocked onto her heels, shaking dirt from her hands as Jack leaned back on his elbows.

Jack flexed his ankle. “It’s not broken.”

“If it was, I could set it with a tree branch,” Tenspot said.

“I’m glad we didn’t have to put that remedy to the test.” Nessa stood up. “Let me check for cuts.”

She rolled up the leg of Jack’s jeans, the dirt making dark outlines of her hands on the denim, like Indian paintings on a cave wall.

Tenspot crowded closer.

Jack sat up, trying to see around the boy’s head. “What do you see?”

We eliminated “it,” pulled Tenspot’s mutterings into actual speech, added additional words for Nessa and Jack, and changed the ending. Most of these changes had nothing to do with difficulty in recording the audio. Instead, we felt the writing needed to be updated, such as eliminating the comma between “tight” and “slippery” in the opening sentence. These days, fewer commas are the trend, and removing them does make the reading flow more quickly.

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***** ABOUT THE AUTHOR *****

HL Carpenter is the pen name of a Florida-based mother/daughter duo who writes from their studios in Carpenter Country, a magical place that, like their stories, is unreal but not untrue. When they’re not writing, the Carpenters enjoy exploring the Land of What-If and practicing the fine art of Curiosity.

Also by HL Carpenter:

The SkyHorse. Fourteen year old Tovi thinks finding a flying horse is fabulous luck–until a mysterious stranger says finders aren’t always keepers.

Dream Stealer. Is stealing a dream better than losing your own?

Pirate Summer. When her brother disappears, Josey is sure she knows where he’s gone. And the only way to bring him home is to travel two hundred years into the past with a boy she can’t trust.

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We write. Visit us in Carpenter Country, a magical place that, like our stories, is unreal but not untrue.

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