It’s 2008 and change is on the way here in Carpenter Country. From now on, this essayist will no longer make references to brain meltdowns or old age. Other depreciating phrases like “I’m an old screw-up” or stereotypical sayings such as “senior moments” will also be banished from her vocabulary.
What’s the reason for this sudden switch in attitude?
Perhaps she’s been reading too many health magazines touting “think good thoughts and you’ll become more confident and upbeat.”
Or she’s heard the stories about how a slowdown in mental processing may begin when a brain hits the young age of twenty or thirty. Which means since her hair is already slightly silver, she’d better change her way of thinking before she climbs the next hill.
On the other hand, it could be the latest research that says no matter what you do, sooner or later your five senses–sight, smell, hearing, touch and taste–will diminish, so while you’ve still got them, you’d better support them.
It might be any one of those, but it’s not.
What she has heard is–when everything else declines, wisdom improves. And she swears that’s the absolute truth.
So, now if she misplaces her car keys, locks herself out of the house, loses an essay or has any other type of brain drain, she’s vowed to use her new-found common sense and good judgment, and never, ever, call herself names or admit to a senior moment.
At least not in print or out loud.